Why did I think I could do this?! I wrote notes to every shallow backpacker I met, and now when the little ones are calling me mama the ones that don't speak to anyone telling me how much they love me, and..., and chupie. ...AND PICA! I feel like my heart is being ripped from my chest. ...and pica what is it that makes it hurt so badly to leave you? I think its because I was able to see just one small peak into your heart and it made me realize YOU are the one in a million, you and alberto and rolando and yerman, the ones that against all odds made it out, with solely the strength of character you have made a life for yourselves, you are still lost boys with the same wounds but with the strength to fight.
Why do I feel so strongly, but suck so badly at expressing any of it?! I am not in love with pica but I have a love deeper than anything I have ever known, deep within my soul, for him, and yaoska, and my lost boys and every child that has cried into my arms for being the most broken victims of this broken world, for rape, abuse, child prostitution, for that gaping hole inside them calling out for the love of a mother, a father, anyone...
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